Posted in: Newborn & Baby
jessica asked:
While he was in the hospital he was in the special care nursery but he was released 2 days after being born. He was only in the special care nursery because I had a fever for a few minutes during my natural delivery. I was not allowed to have my son in my room but made it clear to the staff that I would be available at every feeding to cater to my son’s feeding needs. I asked why he was being fed formula when I asked them not to and they said they would give me time to breastfeed him later on but kept giving me excuses as to why I couldn’t enter since there were very sick babies in the nursery with him. I was only given the allowance to breastfeed the baby one time (they expected me to breastfeed in the presence of several people I did not know who were not hospital staff) while he was in the nursery and he was very frustrated because the nipples on the bottles at the hospital were not slow-flow. They told me not to give up because babies can be lazy! I have been having problems breastfeeding ever since (He was born 1-09-2009) and although I gave him my full supply of colostrum and was able to pump out small amounts of milk since his birth, I have seldom been able to feed him directly from my breast and have purchased 2 breast pumps, an artificial nipple to put over my breast to mimic the nipple of a bottle, and a latch assist (by lansinoh, to allow my nipple to become more erect). My milk supply is now diminishing and throughout this trying time, I have been taking fenugreek 3x daily as well as drinking mothers milk tea every 6 hours. Everything has helped to a degree, but there is simply nothing like doing it the natural way. Help! I feel so inadequate and guilty about giving my son formula and I can’t help but feeling sad. whenever I look at my son, my feelings suddenly change. I do not hold him responsible for what is going on but I do wish he would latch on and eat. I know this is not my fault. Can I sue the hospital?
I have been to the lactation consultant several times. She has been very helpful but I cannot continue going to her. I do not have a car right now and I live in NYC where it is freezing cold outside. We have had some unseasonably warn days lately and I have taken advantage of the ones I could by visiting the lactation consultant however he has been sick so I have not been able to go as often as I would like.
Thanks every one. I would like to add that I WAS ALLOWED to breastfeed. Breastfeeding was not restricted, the nurses in the nursery were just “too busy” to accommodate me and give me the time to do so.
While he was in the hospital he was in the special care nursery but he was released 2 days after being born. He was only in the special care nursery because I had a fever for a few minutes during my natural delivery. I was not allowed to have my son in my room but made it clear to the staff that I would be available at every feeding to cater to my son’s feeding needs. I asked why he was being fed formula when I asked them not to and they said they would give me time to breastfeed him later on but kept giving me excuses as to why I couldn’t enter since there were very sick babies in the nursery with him. I was only given the allowance to breastfeed the baby one time (they expected me to breastfeed in the presence of several people I did not know who were not hospital staff) while he was in the nursery and he was very frustrated because the nipples on the bottles at the hospital were not slow-flow. They told me not to give up because babies can be lazy! I have been having problems breastfeeding ever since (He was born 1-09-2009) and although I gave him my full supply of colostrum and was able to pump out small amounts of milk since his birth, I have seldom been able to feed him directly from my breast and have purchased 2 breast pumps, an artificial nipple to put over my breast to mimic the nipple of a bottle, and a latch assist (by lansinoh, to allow my nipple to become more erect). My milk supply is now diminishing and throughout this trying time, I have been taking fenugreek 3x daily as well as drinking mothers milk tea every 6 hours. Everything has helped to a degree, but there is simply nothing like doing it the natural way. Help! I feel so inadequate and guilty about giving my son formula and I can’t help but feeling sad. whenever I look at my son, my feelings suddenly change. I do not hold him responsible for what is going on but I do wish he would latch on and eat. I know this is not my fault. Can I sue the hospital?
I have been to the lactation consultant several times. She has been very helpful but I cannot continue going to her. I do not have a car right now and I live in NYC where it is freezing cold outside. We have had some unseasonably warn days lately and I have taken advantage of the ones I could by visiting the lactation consultant however he has been sick so I have not been able to go as often as I would like.
Thanks every one. I would like to add that I WAS ALLOWED to breastfeed. Breastfeeding was not restricted, the nurses in the nursery were just “too busy” to accommodate me and give me the time to do so.
May 7th 2009
You COULD sue the hospital, but who knows if you would win or not.
I understand why you are frustrated, but sueing people isn’t the answer. I hate the fact that we live in a country where to “sue” is the answer to every wrong doing. You should bring it up to the hospital administrator and get an apology from the staff. That should be enough.
However, I’m sure they had reasoning for not letting you in there or for giving your baby a little formula. Their job is to keep your baby and the other babies in that room safe. That’s priority number one.
Anyway, I don’t think a lawsuit solves everything and it’s ethically not right in my opinion.
May 7th 2009
Poor thing, I would be furious!!! See a lactation consultant ASAP!! Get on the right track and fix the problem so you can start breastfeeding ASAP. See a specialist tomorrow! Hospitals will usually offer free help for lactation with lactation experts. Keep going for help until you have breastfeeding established.
I don’t know if you can sue . . . You’d have tp see a lawyer.
May 10th 2009
as an expectant mother who would be rather peeved if this happened to me, i HOPE that you can sue.
I would talk to a lawyer (preferably one that doesn’t charge a consult fee) to see what your rights are in this situation. There’s no reason why the baby should have even been IN the neo natal ward, let alone not brought out to you at feeding times…
Sure, a lactation consultant might help, but it sounds as though your baby has already learned to feed from bottles. And often times, because it is easier to feed from bottles, they wont breast feed properly after that. They should have been bringing the baby to you for feeds.
If it doesn’t work out, don’t blame yourself. And don’t forget to weigh up whether the stress of continuing to try is worth it. Sometimes it is better just to give up on the breast feeding, a stressed mummy and baby is not a happy mummy and baby.
And before you go thumbs downing me, i AM a breast feeding advocate, and i KNOW it’s best. But as with anything else in health care, you always weigh up the pros and cons of different courses of action. And sometimes the struggling with breast feeding really ISN’T worth it.
edit: I have gestational diabetes. My diabetes specialist (who is a leading expert in the field) today told me that there’s no real reason why the baby should have to go to the neo natal ward, but that pediatricians can sometimes over react and often send the babies of diabetic women to the neo natal ward when there’s no real need. While my hospital is very pro breast feeding, i am petrified that they will bottle feed my baby- i already have colostrum coming out of my nipples, so i should be able to feed just fine (theoretically) and if they spoiled that by bottle feeding instead of bringing the baby to me I would do my damnedest to sue! Especially if there wasn’t any real need to take the baby away from me in the first place! (Yes, i am managing my diabetes, very well.)
I noticed someone said ‘your baby hasn’t suffered because of this.’ Well, when my brother and I were born, we were bottle fed at the hospital, and no one told my mother that we had been. We caught thrush, which passed to my mum’s nipples. And we had to be weaned from the breast at 3 weeks, and formula fed. We were small babies, 4 weeks premie. And just about anything you’ve heard of that breast feeding reduces the risk of (asthma, weight, diabetes) I have now. Can you prove it WASN’T because i was formula fed instead of BF?
Also, consider the effect on the mother. The emotional turmoil, and the future financial costs of formula feeding. The amount of TIME it takes comparatively. I read somewhere that it costs and average of $1200 a year to formula feed. So don’t pretend that the hospital didn’t screw up. You made you wishes clear, and they surely could have found a way to make sure you and your baby were together for feedings. Of course not take you into your baby, but WHY was the baby in there in the first place? And WHY couldn’t they bring him out to you?
May 12th 2009
You know what, I saw something like this on the news when I was 8 months pregnant with my daughter and this lady sued the hospital for millions of dollars. Her preemie son was allergic to the Enfamil with iron and she wanted to breastfeed him and the hospital denied her of that because she already had diabetes. IDK if she won or not.
May 12th 2009
Talk to a lactation specialist–hopefully your hospital will have one on staff. Some babies really do have a tough time learning to nurse, but a good lactation specialist should be able to help you through it even now.
My sister and I both had horrible experiences trying to breastfeed our first babies; I pushed through it with much help and a latch assist/ nipple guard, and my sister decided to switch to formula. We both have healthy, happy kids now.
I was forced to give my daughter formula when she was a few days old because I had an infection from the hospital and a high fever. It did make the whole process harder, but we made it through just fine in the end. Please don’t give up, and don’t feel bad about feeding your son whatever you have to until you get this worked out. He’ll still be healthy, he’ll still love you, and you’re doing everything you can. Good luck!!!
May 12th 2009
If you had a temp after delivery there was a very good possibility you had an infection and although it did no harm to you it could have been life threatening to preemies in the special care unit. The nurses weren’t giving you excuses but simply doing the right thing. Your baby has suffered no ill affect from being formula fed and the most important thing is for your baby is to eat so as they can grow regardless if its from breast milk or formula. Having a baby is all about change and having to except things that you can’t control. So your baby now prefers bottle just get over it and let him enjoy his feed. Give him breast milk in a bottle and if your milk is not enough top him up with some formula.
May 15th 2009
I would have been VERY angry as well… something similar to this happened to me when I was in the hospital after my baby was born… she had to be taken to get the normal check-up done and she was due for a feeding there were several babies ahead of my baby in the nursery so I TOLD 2 nurses… I need to breastfeed my baby do NOT give her formula… They told me they would bring her back when she needed to eat and they would wake me when they brought her I ended up falling asleep because I was very tired from the medicine and I woke up 3 hours later and no baby insight! It was still hard for me to walk at this point so I pushed the nurse call button for them to bring my baby back and no one responded… after 15 min of pushing the nurse call button (good thing it wasn’t an emergency) I painfully walked down to the nursery to see a nurse feeding my baby formula and right next to her was the little cart for my baby with a HUGE sign saying NO FORMULA BREASTFEEDING ONLY!! I went off the wall when I saw her!!! I was hormonal and started crying and it wasn’t good… well anyway I got this HUGE apology letter from the hospital for the neglegence to my baby’s needs and my stated desires and got this huge package of newborn items (clothes, diapers, tons of stuff way above and beyond what they normally give) and a free of charge lactation consultant to come to my house over and over again if she wouldnt’ breastfeed because of them feeding her formula… luckily for me my baby didn’t have any trouble at all but I would def talk to a lawyer! You have put a lot of money into this because they fed your baby a bottle when you told them not to and now you are being emotionally impacted as well!!! I say try for it…
Good luck and I hope it gets better if not don’t be hard on yourself its not your fault
May 16th 2009
I had several problems beginning breast feeding with my baby too. My heart goes out to you! For the first 6 weeks I had to pump then feed my baby the milk with a bottle. My milk supply was erratic, and I was exhausted. I spent hundreds (maybe a thousand) dollars on lactation consultations and equipment. Then, with hard work and lots of support from my SO, everything just clicked. Now baby and mommy work well together. Breast feeding is easy. You CAN do it. It just will take time and patience.
I mention the cost it took for baby and boobies to work well together because that is where your lawsuit may be. I had to spend so much because my baby had a bizarre suck and I had a bizarre let down reflex. You have spent money due to the hospital staff not being sensitive to your needs and wishes. I used to be a nurse at a children’s hospital, and it is NOT acceptable to keep a breast feeding baby away from the breast. I would have lost my job if I had done that!
Good luck to you. Keep up the good work!
May 16th 2009
Im sorry this happened to you, but be thankful it was only formula. I would go speak with them, and explain to them the extra costs and stress this has caused you. Maybe they can help you by having a lactation consultant come to you.
Just remember it could have been worse…heres what happened to me.
My daughter was born 7 weeks premature, I did not get to see her because they rushed her off to neonatal within the first 5 mins of her being born. I saw her for 20 minutes 4 hours after she was born. She was being fed anything i could pump mixxed with formula via a feeding tube. When my milk finally came in she was getting that for every feed. Then we were put into isolation because there was a staff infectiono n the ward we were in (we had to be in hospital for almost a month). My daughter was in the room with me, but the nurses would bring the breastmilk from the fridge every 3 hours. about 8 days before we went home we were informed that the night nurse had given our daughter milk from another mother accidently.
My daughter had to have several blood tests afterwards to make sure she didnt have any negative effects from it. I was so furious, and I cried, and I Just couldnt deal with being there anymore after that. I ended up giving up completely on trying to get my daughter to breastfeed, and we put her on a bottle so that we could go home sooner. I continued to pump for her till i simply couldnt do it anymore (she was 6months when we stopped).
Add - Ill never understand why some people just go down the list of answers and give thumbs down for no reason…ignorance or just like to be annoying?
May 18th 2009
the truth is you can but it won’t go anywhere because they will say they were worried that you had an infection because of the fever you spiked during delivery and that they felt it was in the best interest of your son to bottle feed him. I feel for you I wasn’t able to breastfeed my son as well but because of medical problems and I like you feel guilty and horrible that I wasn’t able to give my son the good stuff lol he has had a horrible time with the formula I have had to switch it 2 times already so hang in there and I am sorry they put you through this
May 20th 2009
1 on the way - there’s a huge difference between knowing everything about breastfeeding and actually doing it. HUGE difference!
May 21st 2009
I understand your anger and frustration. I had a VERY difficult time getting my little one to breastfeed. When I was in the hospital, right after I had given birth they handed me my son to breastfeed, and I really didn’t know exactly how to do it, and he wasn’t latching on, so some random nurse gave me an artificial nipple and said to use that so his sucking would bring out my nipple. It sounded like bull to me, but I was so dazed and things were going so fast. So here I am trying to breastfeed with this damn piece of plastic between my son and I. I was so frustrated, and so was my son. Then another nurse came in and saw what was going on and Yanked the plastic nipple away and showed me how to hold my breast and my son in the crosshold position. It was working a little better but I kept complaining that it really hurt to breastfeed, but the nurses kept ignoring what I was saying and told me that it was normal for it to hurt a little. Well….two cracked and bleeding nipples later they finally called in a lactation consultant after I started sobbing with pain while breastfeeding. The lactation consultant took one look at my nipples, cringed and got me a pump so that I could still give my baby milk but allow my poor nipples to heal. So basically nobody really helped me until AFTER my nipples got busted up! I was so upset and in so much pain. My son was also jaundiced, so the doctor ordered to have him supplimented with formula so that he could gain weight and get his jaundice under control. My son was also tongue tied, which was the main reason for all the breastfeeding issues, and we got it clipped when he was 10 days old, and it made a world of a difference! And let me tell you, my nipples were torn for two weeks until they finally healed, but I still breastfed him through it. I could have given up I know… The lactatin consultant I saw after I left the hospital was amazed that I was still breastfeeding. The reason I’m telling you my story is to just give you a little hope that if you stick with the breastfeeding you can try to make it work. If it’s something you really want to do then continue trying. I had to supplimemt with formula while I was struggling with breastfeeding, and yes, sometimes my son got frustrated with the breast because it wasn’t as easy as the bottle, but he is totally fine now (11 weeks old) and I have no problems breastfeeding. Things happen in the hospital, doctors do things out of concern and sometimes go overboard. But the most important thing to remember now is that your little one is healthy, and in the end that is ALL that matters. So many other things could have gone wrong, an infection, a fever, and so on. So you should be thankful for that. I understand that things aren’t going as youvhad hoped and always imagined, but sometimes life throws you a curve ball and you just have to work through and roll with the punches. Keep up your good work, your doing everything in your power to keep breastfeeding, and if he needs some formula here and there then it isn’t the end if the world if he gets some. It’s so easy to get caught up with what is going wrong and forget ALL the other things that are going right. You have a beautiful, healthy son, that is so much more than a lot of other people have. Be greatful and enjoy every minute of him.
I don’t think suing the hospital will do anything. You could try, but I’m sure they would say there were legit medical reasons why they kept you away from the nursery and such. I would send an angry letter to the hospital, I’m sure you would get an appology letter back.